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Let’s talk about the thing that gets us mommas in a funk…our body image. Can I say this has to be the thing I struggle with the most? My body doesn’t look, feel, or react the way it used to. I used to eat fast food and junk all day but girl not no more. As a woman I want to feel beautiful and sexy and thin but everyday I struggle with feeling the opposite of these things.
Sometimes I get so depressed standing in front of the mirror in complete disgust. I will complain throughout the day about how fat I feel while grabbing loose skin or I will make comments about how I shouldn’t have eaten this or that. I will go to pick out “cute” clothes to wear and nothing looks or feels good so I just go for the loose fitting shirt instead.
But there is a major problem with all of this. I have a very impressionable daughter who looks up to her momma and mimics everything she does. I would cry if I heard my daughter saying the very things I say about myself about her own body. What message am I sending my daughter who is watching me, even when I don’t think she is?
We had family pictures taken recently and they were so good. Except for every one that I was in I found myself critiquing each imperfection. This picture of my husband and me is great but I did not want to post it to social media because all I see are dimples and a stomach pooch. There are times that I am mortified by pictures of my mom body. Honestly it is hard not to be critical of them when all I manage to see is the stomach pooch, flabby arms, and dimples that just won’t seem to leave me alone. I know I have grown babies and that my body has been stretched like a Stretch Armstrong two times over but it is so hard to keep that in perspective. Truth is, my body is amazing for being able to do this and the false expectations I put on myself for what my body should look like is ridiculous! I don’t want my daughter to do this to herself as she grows up.
So anyways, as hard as it is, and as much as it pains me, I am posting the dang picture. Wanna know the crazy thing, you probably wouldn’t even notice those things if I hadn’t point them out.
Here’s the thing mommas: we can slay hard by going to the gym and eating healthy and getting down to that goal weight but I can sometimes do all of these things and still find something to complain about. It’s like no matter what I do I am still unsatisfied with myself. I can assure you I do not want to pass this unhealthy body image down to my daughter, so why do I do it to myself? She will hear enough from the world about how imperfect she is. I don’t want her to get that from home as well.
I wish I could be one of those moms who post about being satisfied with their amazing mom body but the truth is I struggle being critical everyday. I struggled with it in my pre-mom body days so it’s a lot tougher to not be so hard on this fluffier and looser version of myself. I wish I didn’t have this unhealthy view of my mom body but I am a work in progress so I am starting by posting this picture. It’s freeing in a way because flaws are a reality we need to embrace and my daughter needs to see her momma doing just that. She needs to know that flabby arms, a stomach pooch, and dimples on your legs are ok despite what the world shows and tells them. She needs to see her momma choosing a healthier lifestyle as a choice to be healthy, rather than a bashing my body for an hour and it do nothing but bring me down.